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Entertainment
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Written by Mark D
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Concerns were growing last night in the Big Brother house over the health of ex-morris dancer Bez.
Big brother producers shut down transmission for over ten minutes while a prominent scientist and a trained doctor tried to work out why Bez glowed 'like the sun' in the dark.
House mates were first alerted to Bez's deteriation early yesterday morning, when they found bits of his skin stuffed under his pillow and piled around the alcoholic drinks fridge.
'Skin loss' and 'glow' researchers at the university of Partick-Thistle offered the following statement, 'Only a few individuals over the past decade have been known to metamorphosize, by magic or natural cause, we can only assume he is changing into something. What, we do not know'
Other university researchers offered a theory, 'in the animal kingdom only one tailess amphibian with long web-footed hind legs can hop - the Chinese 'Bungling Clown' Frog. We believe if Mr.Bez stays in the environment he is in at present much longer he will complete the transformation to one'
Once transmission resumed, Bez was seen sat in the Jacuzzi catching flies with his tongue.
Frank Bough, an eminent psychiatrist has explained 'Anybody considering joining a reality TV show, must be careful of attemting to detox the body, particularly, after years of abuse in front of millions of viewers, unless of course you want to be the richest amphibian in swamp land.' Paul daniels admitted that he had nothing to do with it.
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