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Job Vacancies
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Written by Pete G
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Yes, Maximumlies has done it again. We find the jobs you want!
Job Title - Ewok Trainer : Little furry people administrator
Salary/Benefits/Location: 2 crotons per 'cheeky' attempted / company fast-bike / Bolton-Endor
Job Description;
BOLTON: Can it happen?
Patient Ewok trainer required for daily administration of Ewok people and surrounding area.
Key Skills;
(E) Essential (P) Preferred
Log rolling (E)
Applicant must be able to build log piles sufficient for Ewok 'battle log-roll' move.
Tractor Beam Room Key (E)
Must be in possession of latest room key and accompanying door opening technique.
Ewok languange skills (P)
Fluency in 'Wok' not essential but preferred.
Licensed sharp stick (E)
knowledge of both Ewok 'prod' and Ewok 'spin and prod' an advantage.
Fur cleaning glove (P)
The ability to on-the-fly 'fur clean' is greatly enhanced with the SITH cleaning glove - if you have one, you willhave an advantage!
Salary (2 crotons per cheeky attempted/re-induced into head band)
Location: Endor (Forest area, although moon location also available)
Transport: brown fast bike - tree avoidance system fitted.
Consideration of 'Force Breath' available for successful applicant.
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Job Vacancies
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Written by Mark D
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Improve your career prospects - become an Elite Sanitising Environmental Excrement Remover(ESEER) for your local city council. You can work in a positive thinking, happy-go-lucky team and as Blackburn Council Leader described 'work with highly experienced low lifes'.
Use technology sitting on the cutting edge of reality - an automated vacuum scooper so powerful it can (slightly) warp time.
Training prospects are incredible - opportunities to work for the UN overseas occur with regularity. Try the well regarded 'Third World Cuisine' and remove poverty with your amazing new skills! Global warming will end and world debt will be a thing of the past.
To apply send your CV and £1000 (cash) to;
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Job Vacancies
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Written by Pete G
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We at Maximumlies hate to think that people reading have no job.
So, we combed and examined the known Universe for opportunities that we know our loyal readers will want to be aware of.
Job Title - Death Star Counter-Administrator
Salary/Benefits/Location: 1 croton per sectar invoked / company Tie-Fighter / Salford-Tatooine
Job Description;
SALFORD: A new hope
Powerful Jedi required for day to day running of a new Salford Death Star
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